Monday, August 5, 2013

All acts of love and pleasure are my rituals

Most people that know me know that I'm an overachiever, wound pretty tightly, and am my worst critic (read- perfectionist).  None of this is a surprise.  Most of my lessons this year have been about acceptance, peace, finding and maintaining happiness, having faith in myself, my Gods, and my ability to lead myself toward where I need to be, and the release of fear and the ego. 

Today I was thinking back on Eckert Tolle's words in A New Earth.   I know I've mentioned this book before, but I can't speak highly enough about how transformative it has been for me.  In the chapter I was thinking about, he talks about how in a professional session with a client, he witnesses a great releasing of his client's ego.  She had an enormous amount of pain that had been weighing on her for years melt off of her.  Tolle stayed present and mindful, and witnessed this healing unfolding in his client.  Afterwards he went to a restaurant for lunch.  Because he was buzzing at such a high frequency after having witnessed the release of the pain this woman had been holding onto, his presence activated the egoic pain in others that were in the restaurant, irritating people to act in their worse.  This ended with one person, who's egoic pain attachments had reacted the baddest actually got thrown out of the restaurant for being rude and disruptive.  Another person asked Tolle if Tolle had somehow caused this chain of events to happen.  Tolle did feel that his energetic state has been the impetus for the other person's egoic pain to be activated. 

This story lead me to an interesting dialog with myself.  Right now I am starting to study the Course of Miracles as well as off shoot books such from authors such as Marianne Williamson and Gabrielle Bernstein.  Today I was reading about making a commitment to constant happiness and peace in Spirit Junkie.  This philosophy teaches that none of us are separate and that God's love and forgiveness is the real path to peace, awareness, and happiness.  My work on happiness and forgiveness has given me a lot of healing so far in the past couple of months.  However, I have found that this is not always the case when I try to share my revelations with others.  I have found that sometimes, when I share my pride in my progress, happiness, or loving acceptance of myself, that some have responded with the rejection of my ideas.  It seems that their egos respond with fear, trying to reactive the pain and separation in my ego. 

I am concerned that to some extent I will have to hide my actual experiences, and only share my state of mind so that I don't set loved one's off in their egoic response.  To some extent, this feels more separating and scary.  Am I rejecting my loved ones then? Or is this response instead, about me being accepting and patient, and committed to my path, my connection to spirit so that other's egos don't drag me back down into fear and pain? 

I could tie myself in knots over-thinking this!  So, instead, I will have Gabrielle Bernstein remind me how to respond with her video blog entry:  when-someone-doesnt-support-your-spiritual-path vlog

Also, "all acts of love and pleasure are my rituals"
"and I am that which is attained at the end of desire"

When we no longer struggle anymore.  We find peace.  I think a coven named "The Coven of Never ending Happiness" sounds like a good name.  What about the "Circle of the End of Desire"?  How committed are you to Happiness every day?

Carry On...

2 comments:

  1. When you share your emotional and spiritual progress with others—especially those who are not committed to a path of self-discovery—it can trigger strong shadow reactions. I think this happens when they perceive that you are breaking out of the narrative they use to define your place in their reality. It also invites unfavorable comparisons between their life and yours: envy. It's probably not even be happening at a conscious level.

    If you don't feel that you can share the peaks and valleys of your journey with others, it could be that you've either shared with the wrong person, or simply caught them at the wrong time when they might have been focused on their own troubles. I have an inkling that even though the path seems to be a lonely personal struggle, there is a point of deep connection to every other soul who has walked this way. While we may not be able to make a satisfying connection through our Talking Selves, there is a Higher Self connection that is alive with joy to witness the progress of another traveler toward the goal of full awareness.

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  2. Maggie (Moonfire)August 6, 2013 at 2:57 PM

    What Mark said. In my own life, I have repeatedly been brought to the realization that the 'trigger' that appears to cause me to act out, or at least to react irritably to the action of others, is very often my own guilt and shame in apparent comparison with the achievement of someone else. These days I get to decode and release that reactiveness (and many other kinds) in moments ... but it still arises. This is neither the fault of the 'achieving person' nor their obligation to change. It seems clear to me that it's my own ego's insecurity and fear.

    In the early days of this work, the ego was fearful of 'losing' by comparison. Mostly nowadays it seems fearful that if I get 'enlightened' somehow, I might just forget about the ego and never allow it to speak again.

    From my perspective the work you are doing is awesome! (no matter what my shadow/ego wants to tell me, momentarily, about it).

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