the life push

Spring, glorious spring! I absolutely love this time of year. I love it even better now that've moved to slightly more northern climate and am not as allergic to the local flora. Chilly bright mornings displaying the mist and the greening makes me want to run about and sing loudly so that all my neighbors accuse me of being a crazy witch.

This year I find myself painting. There I sit, without enough references, happily creating with old materials in a cramped space. This time for the first time in years, I am listening to my Muse and happy to be where I belong, in my studio. There is no pain, no sense of loss or self-betrayal. I am an art magician and it is good. The art may be a bit rusty, but that will grow as I go along on the process.

I find myself overheated, enflamed, awash in what can only be called "fire in the head", the Celtic Divine Inspiration. I am courting my Muse fervently and lavishly. So much of my thoughts and actions feel magickal. I am looking forward to the months ahead as I turn within in order to create and share in that pulse outward.

I feel I have no right to keep it in, to hide it. Earlier this week I found myself singing "This little light of mine", a bible song I learned as a child. Honestly, it was the only one I liked. I thought about Thelema a lot this past weekend and find that song still, completely illustrates my feelings of Shining your Truth that it is shared with the world.

Echo the sun, be sun-like. Share in Love and Truth. That's right, I'm gonna let it shine! Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine!

Are you shining?

Call of the Sea

We rail against the world. Brandishing our words, and digging our feet in against the persistence of the tide. Bearing arms, and razor sharp swords against nothing but air. Put down your armor. The weight you bear serves no one except your own fatigue.

Float, be still. Stop your thrashing and be supported, weightless and timeless. Allow yourself to change, meld, become—becoming something new, something more. Leave your tears to the Bitter Sea. She will take them as your just sacrifice. The Silent Mother awaits you. Turn not away dear warrior child.

Need you not the bonds of iron for strong are the cords of promises, spoken and unspoken of your own tongue. Obligation binds you and Duty is your witness. Such thin, invisible threads you dare not break. The web is woven, Ariadne the foreman.

Give in, give in, the siren calls. Trust to faith in the strength of this net. Knotted together, one unto the next, the strength of many is at your call. Beneath the water is not the end, but beyond nine waves is the realm of the All.

Freedom in Will

Isn’t it funny how there is such a paradox is freedom, free will, and following your divine destiny or your true Will? Whose will do you serve? To whose will are you a slave? Are you a slave to fear? Inertia? What about greed?

In laziness, in turning away from divine will, there is turmoil, confusion and slavery. In service to truth and freedom and Will, there is fluidity, satisfaction, and fulfillment. There is growth and abundance in these actions.

Today I stepped out of my office, by which I mean desk-slave cell, and into a wondrous environment of a sultry spring day. We are in April, that fabulous time where the air is thick with flowers and birdsong and laughter. The sun was shining and the breeze was pleasant. I sat by the river and read of shoes and ships and sealing wax, and cabbages and kings. Actually I’m reading a book that right now is about the politics of kings and priests. The book is the Seedbearers by Peter Valentine Timlett. One character has to follow with faith his understanding of what spirit wants from him and publicly defy what had been politically decided for him. A priestess meditates on the necessity of the priesthood after a blood lusting general scoffs at the priesthood as weak and useless.

She mentions how if the priesthood and connection to inner planes and ascended masters were not needed, that priests would no longer exist. But they do exist. Priests rise to serve the people and to help connect the people with the divine, and in this, the people evolve.

You might argue that as pagans we are all priests and priestesses directly with our Gods and no clergy is needed. I would say that those drawn to pagan ways do so because they are interested in divine connection and the otherworld and understanding of our spiritual nature. Occult knowledge is complex and by its very name, hidden. I for one may have been able to always connect with something transcendent and eternal, but like the mystic, had trouble holding on to that connection. The training of known pathways and gateways to stronger connection and the training of psychic and energetic skills has been of immeasurable use to me. My life is enchanted, my faith stronger, my energy healthier, and my future more sure than when I started on this path alone. I find both freedom and surety of purpose and the drive to go confidently onward into a future and not cower in fear and indecision.

I serve the Queen of the Witches.
I serve the God of Lords.
I serve the fulfillment of my work in this lifetime, to the best that I am able.
I look toward the future and see a golden bull holding the rising sun between his horns. The rays carry me forward into the diffusion of eternal brilliance and in this may I seek unity and gnosis.

Upon a sea of stars

Dusted with Golden dust and strung with pearls
my skin gilded, lips part.
Held not within a cage, but a cauldron,
Opal egg of a future unfold.

Cords of tension hold us together,
Vibratory, pulling, chaving, singing,
We pull each other up, climbing upward.
And the mountain sings a droning hum.

Mage wind stirs, pulling the sails
Out onto the endless sea
Crystals tinkling faery song
Dance through my hair
And dance across my ears like gentle fingertips.

Stars above and stars below
An endless twlight glow.
And upon my feet silver sandles
Skim the surface of the water below.

Pinpoint of Infinity

Love guide me to right thought and right action
Glory show me the path of clarity
Desire burn true, the seven eternal flames
Power be balanced in love and restrain

I seek the pinnacle of the power of belief, of change of movement.
I seek the humility of service and sacrifice.
May that sacrifice be in service to Love and not to martyrdom.
May wisdom be guided in truth, in experience, in harmony.
May Beauty be the product of the life pulse of love.

I kneel on the dais below the oculus of the Sun.
I will not bow my head, but search skyward.
I reach the stars above me but grasp not.
There is nothing there to own, but to marvel
In an eternal dance of light and Time
I am a sparkle of mist, in a pinpoint of infinity.

Points of Interest

I'm in a fabulous mood today, so here I am dreaming of what the future may hold and trying to keep away brain rot. There's an image. So, I figured I'd share some links of things that are sparking my interest right now:

http://http://www.tarotoftheboroughs.com/ A great new tarot deck that has sharp images and a poignant, modern message too.

http://headforred.blogspot.com/2010/03/waking-up-from-goetic-sleep.html I really like his attitudes toward magickal practice. Its been giving me a lot to chew on, and Rufus references Jason Miller, whose blog can be found:

http://strategicsorcery.blogspot.com/2010/03/99-problems.html

And Detura Press. http://www.daturapress.com/www.daturapress.com/Welcome.html
Debbie Chapnick, owner of detura press has some great thoughts on her blog that introduce topics that can be found in the new Anthology of Occult Wisdom series of the achieves of the Servants of the Light, Delores Ashcroft Norwicki and more to follow. http://daturapress.wordpress.com/2010/03/15/the-origins-of-power/

Good morning spring!

I noticed the hellebore outside my backdoor starting to bloom this morning. Bulbs are poking their way out, the snow has melted, the light is bright and cheerful, and the robins are singing. We just started my favorite months of the year. That cardinal push of spring is singing within me as well. I found myself ready to go the gym, eating better, and for the first time in weeks feeling rested and rejuvinated when I woke up in the morning. Good morning dawn of the year.

Are you living with blinders on? Do you know what you wore yesterday? How about he last time you laughed? Do you know what you had to eat yesterday? If we aren't aware of simple activities throughout the day, chances are we're missing omens and important symbols around us too. Last week I spoke with my Wicca 101 class about the importance of checking in with your internal environment as well. What are your urges telling you? What do your dreams say? Are you writing them down? How do you identify waves of emotions and what are they trying to tell you? All of these things are important aspects of awareness as well as integration. We cannot go through life on auto pilot. We'll miss the boat and the point for that matter!

Driving on the NY thoroughfare last night, I felt the towering presence of the mountains and gnomes. The land spirits just 30 miles from where I live are active, old and generally healthy. Even the sky looks different. I felt myself expand and unfurl, comforted by the bare birch and wet cedar trees, and the overflowing rivers and streams. Where I live is horribly injured. The land spirits are comatose, the fae twisted from polution, overexposure, and overpopulation. And yet, humanity and community are possible. Magick is constant. I ask myself, why have I found myself, a witch drawn to the green and the land on such a wildlife barren and aching place?

I have work to do. So do you. Blessed be.