tinkering with the gears

I am so grateful for the people that support and share life's experiences with me. I had a relaxing and happy weekend with little deadlines and just good sharing with friends. One of my friends from Philly joined by boyfriend and I to go to Tahuti lodge for the Middle Pillar ritual. The ritual was nice, but not as big of a deal as I had thought. I also found out that other than the LBH ritual, I knew all of the pieces and techniques to the rituals. I enjoyed using the Hebrew in the ritual though as we've been spending so much time on that in Chicken Qabala. The other good news is that the ritual took care of the cramps I was having in my neck and shoulder. It is one more way for me to think about those techniques and try to work on the energetic issue I have with my neck freezing up now and then.





Listening to the men talk about Men's mysteries, I started to dream about the Women's mysteries in a way that I hadn't actively thought about it in a while. The funny thing is the subject has come up 3 times in the past week. It's a real need. I know what the end of 09 may look like as I start to prepare for that. (I have to wait for my next intiation which should be this year)



I've also been thinking about how you have to be the change you want to see in the world. This doesn't just go for internal work, but if you want something to happen, you have to do it. For me, this means I need to develop my workshop offerings now and really build a body of work. My journey isn't about keeping busy or always just having fun or experiencing ritual, its about contributing as well. Contributing doesn't mean exercises and activity, it means gifting in a way that isn't done in any other forum.

Despite many activities going on this year, much of my growth and change will be internal. Karate, painting, personal journaling as therapy are all about start back up again. This summer I'll be taking psychology classes as well to get ready for getting my masters in Art Therapy. Today, it occured to me that I could spend 40 hours a week, working, and doing something that I find satisfying and enjoyable. I better do it.