the life push

Spring, glorious spring! I absolutely love this time of year. I love it even better now that've moved to slightly more northern climate and am not as allergic to the local flora. Chilly bright mornings displaying the mist and the greening makes me want to run about and sing loudly so that all my neighbors accuse me of being a crazy witch.

This year I find myself painting. There I sit, without enough references, happily creating with old materials in a cramped space. This time for the first time in years, I am listening to my Muse and happy to be where I belong, in my studio. There is no pain, no sense of loss or self-betrayal. I am an art magician and it is good. The art may be a bit rusty, but that will grow as I go along on the process.

I find myself overheated, enflamed, awash in what can only be called "fire in the head", the Celtic Divine Inspiration. I am courting my Muse fervently and lavishly. So much of my thoughts and actions feel magickal. I am looking forward to the months ahead as I turn within in order to create and share in that pulse outward.

I feel I have no right to keep it in, to hide it. Earlier this week I found myself singing "This little light of mine", a bible song I learned as a child. Honestly, it was the only one I liked. I thought about Thelema a lot this past weekend and find that song still, completely illustrates my feelings of Shining your Truth that it is shared with the world.

Echo the sun, be sun-like. Share in Love and Truth. That's right, I'm gonna let it shine! Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine!

Are you shining?

Call of the Sea

We rail against the world. Brandishing our words, and digging our feet in against the persistence of the tide. Bearing arms, and razor sharp swords against nothing but air. Put down your armor. The weight you bear serves no one except your own fatigue.

Float, be still. Stop your thrashing and be supported, weightless and timeless. Allow yourself to change, meld, become—becoming something new, something more. Leave your tears to the Bitter Sea. She will take them as your just sacrifice. The Silent Mother awaits you. Turn not away dear warrior child.

Need you not the bonds of iron for strong are the cords of promises, spoken and unspoken of your own tongue. Obligation binds you and Duty is your witness. Such thin, invisible threads you dare not break. The web is woven, Ariadne the foreman.

Give in, give in, the siren calls. Trust to faith in the strength of this net. Knotted together, one unto the next, the strength of many is at your call. Beneath the water is not the end, but beyond nine waves is the realm of the All.

Freedom in Will

Isn’t it funny how there is such a paradox is freedom, free will, and following your divine destiny or your true Will? Whose will do you serve? To whose will are you a slave? Are you a slave to fear? Inertia? What about greed?

In laziness, in turning away from divine will, there is turmoil, confusion and slavery. In service to truth and freedom and Will, there is fluidity, satisfaction, and fulfillment. There is growth and abundance in these actions.

Today I stepped out of my office, by which I mean desk-slave cell, and into a wondrous environment of a sultry spring day. We are in April, that fabulous time where the air is thick with flowers and birdsong and laughter. The sun was shining and the breeze was pleasant. I sat by the river and read of shoes and ships and sealing wax, and cabbages and kings. Actually I’m reading a book that right now is about the politics of kings and priests. The book is the Seedbearers by Peter Valentine Timlett. One character has to follow with faith his understanding of what spirit wants from him and publicly defy what had been politically decided for him. A priestess meditates on the necessity of the priesthood after a blood lusting general scoffs at the priesthood as weak and useless.

She mentions how if the priesthood and connection to inner planes and ascended masters were not needed, that priests would no longer exist. But they do exist. Priests rise to serve the people and to help connect the people with the divine, and in this, the people evolve.

You might argue that as pagans we are all priests and priestesses directly with our Gods and no clergy is needed. I would say that those drawn to pagan ways do so because they are interested in divine connection and the otherworld and understanding of our spiritual nature. Occult knowledge is complex and by its very name, hidden. I for one may have been able to always connect with something transcendent and eternal, but like the mystic, had trouble holding on to that connection. The training of known pathways and gateways to stronger connection and the training of psychic and energetic skills has been of immeasurable use to me. My life is enchanted, my faith stronger, my energy healthier, and my future more sure than when I started on this path alone. I find both freedom and surety of purpose and the drive to go confidently onward into a future and not cower in fear and indecision.

I serve the Queen of the Witches.
I serve the God of Lords.
I serve the fulfillment of my work in this lifetime, to the best that I am able.
I look toward the future and see a golden bull holding the rising sun between his horns. The rays carry me forward into the diffusion of eternal brilliance and in this may I seek unity and gnosis.